Marriage can be difficult, even if both partners value it and hope to maintain it. A husband hard of hearing may be worse off then most when it comes to making the Golden Years happy ones. In fact, he may not even know what is happening at first, since many men fail to realize that they are losing this important sense.
He comes home from a hard day and there's his wife, with dinner almost ready and a pleasant smile. He settles in for his favorite program, cranks up the volume a little (the set is getting old and the sound is not as clear as it once was), and relaxes. Suddenly there is his wife, looking cross and shouting - shouting - that dinner is ready. He doesn't realize that this is the third time she's said this and that she's shouting to be heard over the blaring TV.
Another problem, and one not so easily solved, is that what goes first for many men is high-pitched sounds. This means they have difficulty hearing their wives, daughters, and grandchildren speak. A wife may lose the ability to converse happily in the car, to talk from another room, or to have boisterous family gatherings with everyone milling around together. Fathers become increasingly shut out of general conversations.
A wife whose spouse can't hear her may resort to shouting, which most husbands don't like all that much. They may be bewildered when she crossly repeats herself, since they totally missed the first part of the exchange. They may also think that, since they have no trouble hearing their men friends (with deeper voices) the problem lies with her, anyway.
Hopefully both partners want to avoid letting a physical problem derail a happy union. The husband may have to steel himself to getting hearing aids - never as good as natural sound - and having them adjusted until they work well. The wife will have to remember not to talk from the other room, to allow for background noise, and to keep a pleasant expression on her face even as she repeats herself.
There is also surgery, which once used to be performed mostly on children with a lifetime of impairment before them but is now not unusual among seniors. It's really worth investigating what can be done to help your spouse hear things like the grandchildren, general conversations when the family gets together, voices on the phone, and sermons in church.
Fortunately the husband in our story decides to get informed early, since he has spent his working life in a noisy environment - the military (or farming, or carpentry, or as a musician, or as a miner) - that has probably damaged his ears. He also knows that his high blood pressure, his bad circulation, and his medications can contribute to hearing loss. Being deaf is worse for relationships than being blind, so he wants to do what he can.
Specialists, clinics, and professional technicians can provide information and testing to determine the level of loss. It will really help if husbands and wives work together to anticipate this problem and seek solutions.
He comes home from a hard day and there's his wife, with dinner almost ready and a pleasant smile. He settles in for his favorite program, cranks up the volume a little (the set is getting old and the sound is not as clear as it once was), and relaxes. Suddenly there is his wife, looking cross and shouting - shouting - that dinner is ready. He doesn't realize that this is the third time she's said this and that she's shouting to be heard over the blaring TV.
Another problem, and one not so easily solved, is that what goes first for many men is high-pitched sounds. This means they have difficulty hearing their wives, daughters, and grandchildren speak. A wife may lose the ability to converse happily in the car, to talk from another room, or to have boisterous family gatherings with everyone milling around together. Fathers become increasingly shut out of general conversations.
A wife whose spouse can't hear her may resort to shouting, which most husbands don't like all that much. They may be bewildered when she crossly repeats herself, since they totally missed the first part of the exchange. They may also think that, since they have no trouble hearing their men friends (with deeper voices) the problem lies with her, anyway.
Hopefully both partners want to avoid letting a physical problem derail a happy union. The husband may have to steel himself to getting hearing aids - never as good as natural sound - and having them adjusted until they work well. The wife will have to remember not to talk from the other room, to allow for background noise, and to keep a pleasant expression on her face even as she repeats herself.
There is also surgery, which once used to be performed mostly on children with a lifetime of impairment before them but is now not unusual among seniors. It's really worth investigating what can be done to help your spouse hear things like the grandchildren, general conversations when the family gets together, voices on the phone, and sermons in church.
Fortunately the husband in our story decides to get informed early, since he has spent his working life in a noisy environment - the military (or farming, or carpentry, or as a musician, or as a miner) - that has probably damaged his ears. He also knows that his high blood pressure, his bad circulation, and his medications can contribute to hearing loss. Being deaf is worse for relationships than being blind, so he wants to do what he can.
Specialists, clinics, and professional technicians can provide information and testing to determine the level of loss. It will really help if husbands and wives work together to anticipate this problem and seek solutions.
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